About Me

Kent, United Kingdom
I have the perfect family but still struggle to find the light in the darkness of post-natal depression.

Saturday, 4 April 2009

Re-evaluating?

I'm in a bit of a quandary today, and I shouldn't be. It's all very odd. But I expect you are used to that by now.
So this afternoon we popped out to buy some laminate flooring - it's my first big purchase using my redundancy money (although at £160 it's not exactly massive!) and we decided to go ahead with it despite the potential lack of future paycheques simply because the carpet downstairs is getting too awful to live with.
This is important, honest...bear with me!
So after paying for the flooring I decided to pick up a free newspaper on my way out of the shop. No real reason other than I hadn't read a copy of it for a while, and I'll read anything!
We then went off out and about and I've only just managed to read it. And noticed that they are advertising for freelance and contract journalists. And wasn't as excited by that as I thought I would have been.
On the surface it looks perfect - a freelance position should, in theory, give me the flexibility I need, and it's the profession I've dreamed of, trained for and dedicated my life so far to.
So why am I not already composing my application?
I'm not really sure. Maybe because the state of the industry makes me nervous still. Maybe because a return to the stress of a newsroom dooesn't seem that great after a few months out of it. Maybe because I'm enjoying all the other bits and pieces I'm doing.
I've thought and thought and worried and thought about what to do and have decided to go with the flow for a bit. Maybe the advert was the reason I was meant to pick up that edition of that paper today. So I'll respect those signals from the universe and sent off my CV, and if it's meant to be, then it's meant to be. But if it's not then so be it and I'll continue with everything else I'm doing. Maybe I can even do both - and conquer the world at the same time! I'll let you know...

2 comments:

Kate said...

Hello!
Glad to see the return of lots of regular entries. I tried clicking on your links but they didnt work....

Liz said...

I'm not sure I'm glad about the return of lots of entries - I always worry that the urge to blog means a return to madness....
Grrr to links - will check it out otherwise my cunning plan will be foiled!